Frustrated with being lonely.
Being without soft, physical connection.
Tired of feeling like this.
The last few days have me missing Arizona, but in a totally different way than I have. Coming up on one year away from home makes me realize that my attachment to Prescott and the people in it has been sort of abruptly removed in my head. I always think about home but only now see that home doesn’t think about me. I don’t mean that in a bad way, but everything moves on. And here I am in my own place that I’ve made my new life. It’s a good feeling but one that also brings sadness, because I’ll never have those times back. It’s a strange nostalgia I’ve never felt before and am obviously having a hard time putting into words. But I am sort of having the time of my life, regardless of missing my parents constantly and wishing I could spend my time with Connor. I think for the first time ever portland really does feel like home, my place, not somewhere I am temporarily until I go back.
~~~***summer night adventures***~~~
This summer>most things
After a long weekend of drinking and having to wake up early this morning, it feels so indescribably good to go to bed fresh out of the shower, all shaved and smooth and smelling good wearing clothes right out of the dryer. I’m going to sleep like a lil baby tonight!
It were easier for me to express the way I feel, or the insecurities I have, or how vulnerable I really am.
Like.. I really didn’t want to feel like this again.
Head vs. Heart. Always. And the one you chose never seems to be the right one.
Today is beach day
Boise is pretty boring. But it’s a pretty good half way point.